(I Still Don't Need No) Good Advice? - Debbie Bennett

Recycling a blog post from way back (because life is really just running away with me right now), I thought I'd revisit my hugely popular advice column and see if the pearls of wisdom from 2013 are still relevant today ...

Girls of a certain age – hands up who remembers Cathy & Claire? These were the agony aunts of every 70s girl’s favourite teen magazine, Jackie. Would you believe you can pay nearly thirty pounds now for original back copies of this magazine that told us what to wear on a date and how to tell if a boy liked you?

So in the spirit of our lovely 70s aunties, I’m going to use this month’s blog to offer some advice to independent authors. These are things I’ve learned in the two years I’ve been self-publishing on Amazon and elsewhere. Maybe some will resonate with you, maybe not. Maybe I'm just being a grumpy old woman this month... You probably won’t agree with me anyway.

Dear Aunty Debbie: I’ve published a book on Amazon and some people don’t like it. Should I tell them they’re wrong, or get all my mates to vote down their reviews? A Sad Author

Dear Sad Author: Reviewers are our friends. What they write in a review is entirely their own business and you have no right to trash them, call them out or down-vote their reviews en-masse. Snarky and/or inappropriate reviews will be seen by readers for what they are. Dozens of the authors’ “friends” descending on a reviewer to attack them will only scare away other potential reviewers of your book who won’t be brave enough to be honest or even bother. Unless you know the reviewer and thank them privately, the only correct response to a review is nothing at all.

In 2024, reviews can be just a toxic as they were then. And we also have the readers who will only review books they like - all well and good, but it's probably the same readers who say that if a book only has all 5-star reviews, they must be fake.

Dear Aunty Debbie: Amazon is trying to steal my money. Should I tell everybody how awful they are? Broke Author.

Dear Broke Author: Amazon is a company that is out to make a profit, yes, but by and large KDP is set up to mutually benefit it and the author. It serves no purpose for Amazon to prevent people from buying your books, so why the conspiracy theories? I'm sure there *are* times when Amazon has genuinely made an error/revoked your privileges/removed reviews heavy-handedly, but for the most part they play fair. Are you really sure that your friend bought a book and the sale didn’t register? Sales take time to register, algorithms change, reviews get removed (or not), so why expend time and energy that you could be putting to use in your writing?

2024 and Amazon has more issues with terminating accounts than paying out money. So many writers are losing their accounts - sometimes permanently - thanks to the heavy-handed action of the Amazon bots. The situation isn't helped by those out to make a fast buck by pushing huge numbers of low-content and/or bad-quality offerings, but sadly the occasional real author gets caught up in the mess and is cast out of Amazon without ever knowing what they did wrong. The advice? Read the t&c carefully and do not ever deviate.

Dear Aunty Debbie: I’ve found this brill place where I can post my books. It’s fab. What do you think? Soon-To-Be-Famous Author

Dear Soon-To-Be-Famous Author: ALWAYS read the small print. This used to be only applicable to small independent publishing companies but is rapidly now applying to the big 6 too. Don’t sign and/or upload anything until you are sure you have read and understood the terms and conditions. It’s no good complaining you have no rights if you signed them away or agreed to waive them by uploading your book. There are some horrendous examples of t&c from publishers floating around on the internet at the moment – do you really want to give up your digital rights for “life of copyright”? Until 70 years after you die? With no reversion clause? Click yes to accept and you will NEVER have control of that digital copy ever again.

And now in 2024, t'internet is awash with sites such as Goodnovel, Dreame, Stary Writer etc. They change names regularly, but all have things in common: they are based in countries with little online regulation, they pay very little unless you are prepared to give them exclusive rights and they expect you to upload a minimum number of words every day, with only a few 'days off' per month. Miss any deadline and you don't get paid and quite possibly lose your work too.

Dear Aunty Debbie: Why is Smashwords not like Amazon? Should I tell everybody that I don’t like it? And why don’t I get my money quickly from the sites it distributes to? And why when I earn money, does every US company insist on keeping 30% of it. It’s my money. And why can’t I … Whinging Author

Dear Whinging Author: STOP WHINGING! Honestly. It’s everywhere. Complaining about reviews, ganging up on reviewers, whining to amazon about anything and everything. Talk about biting the hand that feeds – nobody forces you to enrol in KDP Select or even to put your book up on Amazon or anywhere else at all. Facebook posts, blog posts, you name it. Authors complain about Amazon, Smashwords, other authors’ allegedly dubious practices. Really, it doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things and just makes you sound like a sulky child who hasn’t got the toy he wanted.

The best way – the only way – to deal with these companies, authors and reviewers who are all out to get you is to:
·         Write more books.
·         Write better books.
·         Be professional.

Do those three things and you can’t go wrong.

No change here. Everybody still likes a good moan, don't they. But keep on doing those three things and you'll be fine!

Love from Aunty Debbie

Comments

Peter Leyland said…
Thanks for this entertaining post Debbie. I was especially interested in your comments about reviewing books. First it's a really difficult thing to do well as I found recently and I think you've made that clear (you can't please everybody) and secondly I learned that you can't review a book on Amazon unless you have actually bought it yourself. At least I think that's the case.

I never read Jackie though. Perhaps that would have helped. Didn't Jacqueline Wilson have something to do with it?
Sarah said…
Jackie magazines were the "go to" in the school library for the problem pages. Thanks for the trip down memory lane and some sound author advice!
Oh dear - I tend to be guilty of not reviewing books I don't like. Must remember your comment about this in future! (though I don't complain about some books having all 5* reviews)
Griselda Heppel said…
Ha ha I loved this! Of COURSE I remember Cathy and Claire. I can probably even remember some of the advice they gave, which in hindsight was rather sweet but often naive (certainly in comparison to today's equivalents). Lurved Jackie, too, to which I owe winning a schools' quiz because I knew the names of lots of pop groups, thanks to the photo on the back of each issue. (My son starred in a musical a few years ago based on the magazine, and was bemused by the audiences being made up entirely of tearful middle-aged mum figures.)
You're quite right about Amazon reviews. It's far more believable to have a mix of good and critical ones than all 5 star ones. Whenever I ask readers to review (which I do!) I emphasise that it's having a lot of reviews that helps visibility, not that they all have to be stellar ones. (Although there have been instances of deliberate attacks on authors, a mass 1 star review campaign. Horrid as this is, trying to counter it only makes things worse, as Kate Clanchy found out.)
And Peter, while Amazon does demand you have bought the product through the company for everything else, they waive this demand for books. So you can review any book you like there, however you bought it (as long as you spend a minimum at Amazon generally of I think £40 per year).