Researching times gone by – Elizabeth Kay

 

You can look at any number of books, watch any number of films, but if you want a real taste of what mediaeval England was like there’s nothing better than a re-enactment. I have been to a reconstruction of the Battle of Hastings, which was really educational. I always assumed that, as in films such as Henry V, the opposing sides just went at one another until one side had killed all the rest, or the opposition had surrendered. Not so – both sides had rest periods, and then they’d start fighting again. War was a far more gentlemanly pursuit in those days, although the slaughter and the life-changing injuries were real enough, and no antibiotics or pain relief. I have been to the Loxwood Joust twice now, and I can’t recommend it highly enough. Each time it was absolutely terrific. The food was pretty authentic the first time I went, too – I remember the venison stew. These days they still have the hog roast, but there was also Vietnamese food, fish and chips, hot dogs and burgers. Plenty of mulled cider. There are lots of side attractions, as well as the battle with real cannons and hawking displays.

A torturer exhibits his instruments, and describes how they work. This is very popular with children, and the more gory the details the better. You can try your hand at archery, meet the soothsayers in the woods, and watch the court jester.

We have a lot of wonderful castles in this country, many of which are extremely well-preserved. Hever Castle was the childhood home of Anne Boleyn. It has been well restored, and houses a big collection of tapestries and Tudor portraits. It’s got a proper moat and drawbridge, and mazes, gardens and lakes. It possesses plenty of antique furniture as well as instruments of torture… the miniature model houses are worth seeing, too. In the summer, there are the sort of activities that turn up at many historic buildings. Archery, an open-air theatre, falconry…Situated on the Kent/Surrey/Sussex border Hever Castle is set in rural countryside with good links to the UK motorway network and a choice of rail stations nearby.

Palaces are well-preserved, too. Hampton court is terrific these days. Actors dress up in the costume of the period, and perform impromptu pieces which can be anything from an argument in the great hall to a discussion about weapons. You can visit the kitchens and the magnificent gardens, and see what is reputed to be the biggest grapevine in the world. There is a real tennis court, and sometimes people will be playing on it. Real tennis is rather different to the tennis we play these days. One of the best ways to get there is by public transport to Kingston-upon-Thames, and then catch a boat, which was the preferred method of travel in the sixteenth century. Several buses stop right beside the landing stage where you embark, you can book online, and it’s not terribly expensive. It’s a great day out, and the building isn’t all that different from the way it was in Henry’s time.

The story of Nonsuch Palace is a sad one. Started by Henry VIII with the intention of rivalling Versailles, he threw everything at it – the best sculptors, garden designers, architects. All that remains today of the most beautiful of Henry’s projects are a couple of obelisks to show where it once stood, and the foundations of the banqueting hall, which was a different building some distance away. Elizabeth I liked it the best of all, and it was where Essex burst into her bedroom and saw her without her wig or her make-up. It fell into disrepair, and was finally given to Barbara Castlemaine, the long-term troublesome mistress of Charles II and mother of five of his illegitimate children, to pay her off. She had the remains of the palace demolished and sold as building rubble to pay off her gambling debts. In the mansion house, a more recent building in Nonsuch Park, there is an excellent model of what the palace would have looked like, based on paintings and drawings done at the time. There are relics of the Palace there, as well as in Bourne Hall in Ewell. I wrote a sestina about it.

 

NONSUCH CRONE

 

The turret, cusped and jagged as a tooth,

All worked in white reminds me of my youth.

For this place, Nonsuch Palace, is in truth

The best-loved of my houses.  I can tell

My father also loved it passing well -

But noble birth is no defence ‘gainst hell.

 

Six wives: is he in heaven or in hell?

I’ll not repeat his errors; my sweet tooth

For younger flesh than mine will never tell.

The white work on my face conceals the truth -

At sixty-six I need my mask of youth;

I play the statesman and the prince as well.

 

So Essex, when you bade your fond farewell

Did you intend to hurt me, give me hell?

I sent you off to sow the dragon’s tooth

Against O’Neill, in Ireland - now they tell

Me words you said behind my back - God’s truth!

“Her crooked carcase?”  - how we miss our youth.

 

You went against my wishes, wretched youth;

Instead of war you made a truce. Though well

I like your face, I trust you not. You’re hell-

Bent on revenge, short-sighted fool.  A tooth-

Some man with charm like Dudley, whispers tell -

Though in my presence none dare speak that truth.

 

You tried to save your face, and hide the truth;

Impetuous, your plan, a trait of youth -

You burst into my chamber; not done well.

My face, unsaved, a harridan from hell -

A pox-marked skin, no hair, a blackened tooth;

You couldn’t hide your shock - oh, I could tell.

 

My wig lay prone beside me; all the tell-

Tale signs of ageing, and you saw the truth -

That underneath the mask, no flush of youth.

A Nonsuch crone - I tried its wishing-well

But all I got were echoes back from hell;

For now, I fear, I’m too long in the tooth.

 

So tooth and nail I’ll tussle with you, youth;

A bitter battle this, for truth to tell

I loved you well - but love must go to hell.