Call Me Big-Headed - by Susan Price
"In the Ghost World, beyond Iron Wood, lay all that wasleft of the Northlands; and in that timeless Northlands' forest there is a gyrfalcon. It has been a gyrfalcon so long, it has almost forgotten that it was once a mortal baby, and then a shaman's apprentice and a shaman, and a Czar's black angel.
Ghost Dance by Susan Price And that is the end of this story (says the cat).
If you thought it tasty, then serve it to others.If you thought it sour, sweeten it with your own telling.But whether you liked it, or liked it not, let it make itsown way back to me, riding on another's tongue."
This is from the ending of Ghost Dance, the third book in my Ghost World Sequence. I've just finished turning it into a paperback, so now all three books are available as paperbacks again.
I wrote these books a long time ago, and it's been a rather odd experience, going back to them.
When you first begin a book, and the idea is alight in your imagination, it's a wonderful, exciting time. New ideas and images spring into your head, seemingly unplanned, from some other place... They jostle and fight for attention, almost too many to get down on the page.
Then tying the images together and making the plot work becomes difficult and frustrating, a chore...
By the time you've finished rewriting it several times, you're sick of it. There are no longer any surprises in it for you. Passages that were meant to be beautiful seem merely mundane and dull. Surprising revelations are anything but - trite and well-worn. You lose all judgement about the thing.
With conventional publishing, the book may be taken away from you for several months - and then the proofs are suddenly sprung on you. With luck, this is rather cheering. The break from it has renewed your interest. You've forgotten some of the details, so it seems fresher. Your faith in it perks up a little.
By the time it makes it into the shops, you've usually moved on to some other fantastically shining, wonderful new idea, and you've done with the old book. If it gets reviewed well, that's rather nice - if it sells well, even better, because then you have some money to live on while you write - but you're really not that interested by then. Or so I've found.
But let twenty years go by... Then re-reading the book is like reading something written by someone else entirely. I was startled by Ghost Dance. The power of the occult scenes took me aback. I'd forgotten the chill of the descriptions of the dying Northlands. Did I really write this powerful book? - Well, that's my name on the title page.
Call me big-headed if you like. Maybe I am - but I'm being honest about the experience of re-reading this book, which I wrote a long time ago. I suppose it's one advantage of growing older.
Paperback e-book
Comments
The Ghost World books are true classics, and you've a right to be proud of them.
Because - not having had the work-load of writing them - I was knocked all of a heap by 'I Am The Great Horse' and 'The Quickening.'
It's a strange thing, though, that we can never see our own books as others do - just as we can never hear our own voice as it sounds to others.
Oh, and that feeling of 'how could I have written this?'is so familiar. I've been working on little texts over the last few years, and my two picturebooks seem to be doing well. I love the discipline of writing to a small wordcount - like poetry, and not easy - but I have Young Adult novels, and novels, some previously published, some not, which I can't deal with. "For Maritsa with Love" is one of my more important ones, which may, or may not, be re-published by Dennis Hamley. In the meantime, I can edit longer stuff, but not really write it.
And Chris, yes, I think there's always a point in a book where you despair, think it's rubbish, think you're never going to be able to pull it all together and solve all the problems. I certainly felt that with the third Sterkarm book, which I finished last year. But most of the time, if you grit your teeth and keep going, it does work out.
And Bill - thank you!
And dark... darker than any children's fiction I've come across - and yet uplifting and full of light for all that. Book 3 is my favourite, with a climax that is still hissing in my brain more than a year on...
I caught a rumour that a fourth book might be on the cards??!
It's not big-headed to be pleased - very pleased - as pleased as you like - with such mind-blowing stories.