LOOKING AHEAD TO THE NEW YEAR - Susan Jane Smith B.Sc

Harry's Home!

          I think that now I’ve done this for a few months I will change the title of my blogs for the New Year! 

          I was new to writing, publishing, social media and blogging.  Now I am gaining confidence and am taking my books seriously!  They were a change from counselling/psychotherapy so the transition has taken a while.
          Yes, I wrote “Harry’s Home! A Cat Compendium” because I love cats and donate £1 for each book sold to support cat rescue groups. It’s not on Kindle yet because of the colour pictures so order via www.EmotionalHealthForEmotionalWealth.co.uk please.

          “ Pre-Marital MOT: A Relationship Inspection” would make a great Christmas present for any couple intending to marry in the New Year!  Order via website by 15 December or see Kindle!

           What I will be doing over the next few months is blogging primarily about the information in my book “Emotional Health for Emotional Wealth”.  This is a book you can dip into and you do not have to read the whole thing unless it is relevant to you!  It is in paperback and on Kindle.

          Understanding incest and child sexual abuse might not seem like much of a Christmas present from me to you, but it would if you were a victim that had never gotten the emotional baggage from it sorted out.  My book is a solid starting place!  New Year is a good time to make changes.

          Statistically everyone does know someone who has been abused in some way.  The poem below is an extract from my book and was written many years ago by a client. She speaks for so many of the people with whom I worked when I was a therapist.   I still cry every time I read it:-

The Pain

Memories that I wish could be mine

A Daddy so caring, strong, so fine                   

A man to admire, worship, adore

A source of guidance, loving and sure

A safe love:  one that shelters and shields

A wise discipline he gently wields

But sadly these will never be true

The man who fathered me was you

The memories  that I can recall

Invaded my body, raped my soul

A childhood innocence and trust

Twisted and broken to serve your lust

The taste, the smell, the look in your eyes

The vicious words, the callous lies

My tears – your aim, my pain – your pleasure

What memories for you to treasure!

A little girl made to whimper and cower

Susan Jane Smith B.Sc

Was this your idea of masculine power?   

‘Evil’ the word, no other will do

For the years of hell you put me through

You hurt, despised, degraded and defiled

You had total control when I was a child

I kept your secret for so many years

It burdened my life, walled- up my tears   

So long the pain I’ve had to hide

Repressed, twisted, buried, denied

I let nobody close, no one could know

For fear the badness inside me would show

But soon I’ll be angry, bitter and sad

Grieve for the childhood that I never had

There’s no turning back, I want to be free

And find the woman I am meant to be

The path is so hard though, the road so long

I tremble and doubt, can I be so strong?

I follow the flame of life inside

It’s burned so low, but never quite died.”