The Zone.by Bill Kirton
What does it mean to be ‘in the zone’. You
usually hear it from sportsmen such as golfers, who are either grateful that
God has taken time out to accompany them on a round and make sure all their
putts drop, or have succeeded because they’ve been ‘in the zone’ (hereinafter
ITZ). To me, it simply means that you’re focusing on (and presumably enjoying)
something so much that you don’t notice the passage of time, you’re unaware of
your own self, your identity, your surroundings, or anything other than
whatever the activity demands.
I’m writing about it because a couple of
recent experiences have reminded me of how exhilarating it is. One was a life
drawing class. I’m rubbish at it but merely having to focus on minute, specific
details and try to reproduce them on paper seems to switch off everything else
in the brain. The other was some wood carving. I’m better at that because I’ve
been doing it for several years, having started when I was researching The Figurehead, my novel about a
figurehead carver in 19th century Aberdeen .
Anyway, I was carving a bird and, after concentrating on trying to
get the basic shapes of its eyes, beak and claws right, I suddenly
realised that four hours had passed and it was time to rejoin reality and
remember who I was/am. During that time, the only thoughts in my head involved
which gouge to use, how much I needed to slice away to get the angles right,
how the pale wood revealed by the cuts contrasted with the darker (dirtier)
wood I was cutting into and so on and so on. With most activities, even
enjoyable ones, the mind now and then wanders away into thoughts of a job that
needs doing, ideas for stories, daydreams, anticipations and memories. There
seem to be different bits of the brain throwing their preoccupations or
delights into the mix. But, these ITZ moments seem to tell all those other bits
of brain to shut up and let whoever’s doing whatever it is get on
with it.
People cleverer than I am would now segue
into the nature of Zen, and I can see the attraction of training the mind to
experience that sort of oneness as often as possible. But all I feel is
curiosity. It’s the total loss of self-awareness that’s so surprising. If the
gouge slips and I cut my hand or lop off the claw I’ve just fashioned so
carefully, I’m suddenly me again and I remember that this is a pretty frequent
occurrence during carving sessions. But I stop the bleeding, put on the
elastoplast (or start trying to remake the claw), and, pretty soon, it’s just
the wood and what’s happening to it that takes over again.
On the infrequent occasions when I’ve
wondered about this, I’ve assumed that it’s the pleasure we take in the
experience that makes it so special – but here’s a paradox. The focus is so
intense that you don’t even know you’re having a good time. The enjoyment is retrospective.
You stop, notice that four hours (or whatever) have passed and then you feel
the contentment. There’s a gap between sensation and perception.
Because writing is my job nowadays, most of
my ITZ moments are connected with it. It almost never happens when I’m writing
something commercial or non-fiction, but when I get into a novel, short story,
flash fiction, it’s a familiar experience. It doesn’t happen so much during the
research phase, but once the characters have started taking over, I’m so curious
about them and their world that my own ceases to exist. The choice of words and
the order in which I put them seems to be part of the fabric of whatever these
people or creatures are doing and although, objectively, I know I’m the one
who’s writing them, the ‘me’ isn’t there. I mean, how can I write of a scene
near Aberdeen
harbour in the days of sailing ships when I’m sitting here at the computer with
a mobile phone in my pocket with more computing power than the Apollo
mooncraft?
Don’t get me wrong – I’m absolutely NOT
trumpeting my own talent, I’m saying that this thing happens and I’ve no idea how. Or
why for that matter. It’s a type of controlled oblivion. I sneakily suspect
that all these ITZ moments are so valuable because they give us the impression
that we’re in control, we’re actually shaping experience and making sense of
it. It’s a familiar delusion – you get it from carving wood, writing, painting,
making music, playing golf, sailing and no doubt hundreds of other things with
which I’m not familiar.
I only wish I could be aware of the
pleasure it’s giving me as I’m doing it rather than only in the moments when I
stop. But that’s just me being greedy.
PS. For Madwippit's eyes only. The bird in question is now sitting on a table (or probably stuffed in the bottom of a dark cupboard) at my sister's house in Plymouth but here's one I made earlier.
PS. For Madwippit's eyes only. The bird in question is now sitting on a table (or probably stuffed in the bottom of a dark cupboard) at my sister's house in Plymouth but here's one I made earlier.
Comments
Sue, as Lee says, that's an interesting angle. It's not just routine hand-eye co-ordination so it makes greater demands.
Madwippit, your wish is my command (only it's a different bird.)
Later his wife remarks, 'I looked in on you to see if you wanted a cup of coffee, but you weren't there. Did you go out for a walk?'
Writer: 'What are you talking about? I was there at my desk all evening.'